What have I done?

So is it ultimate narcissism or cutting edge trendiness that causes one to start a blog?  I guess time will tell.  I wanted to start a blog because I often think that I should have my own reality TV show and since that bitch Kate won't step aside to let the TLC cameras follow my (much more interesting and less prolific) family around, I had to take matters into my own hands. 

Take today for instance.  My son, M,  is very good at creating what would be "must see TV".  I left him unattended (he's 10) for about 20 minutes while I did important household tasks (read: update facebook status and check online bank statement) and returned to find that he had gotten a cantaloupe from the counter, bored a hole into it with his picky fingers and proceeded to eat the all the innards with his hands.  I found him with seeds and juice and pulpy bits all over his face, hands, clothes, TV, laptop and the living room floor.  Now before you judge a 10 year old for such poor manners I must let you in on the fact that he is quite severely autistic and his favorite pastime is stealing food.  Our kitchen looks like Fort Knox with a chain and padlock on the refrigerator and child safety locks on all the cupboards.  Sadly tonight I forgot the lonely cantaloupe on the counter so it was Son: 1 and Mom: 0.  After sucking cantaloupe seeds from the laptop and out of the front of the VCR it was definitely time for bed.

The other players in my cast of characters for my "show" are my 10 year old daughter, J, (twin of my son) who is typically developing and my husband L. who is a Dr. and is working nights this week.  We also have a very old cat with a thyroid condition who needs meds 2x a day.  Add to this my part time job as a therapist, my kids extra curricular activities, a large house and a garden of "abundance" and you'll see why I need a camera crew.  At the very least they could alert me to unlocked cupboards and mischief on my son's mind.